I've had to step back from blogging for the past two weeks, mainly as an effort to protect our priorities. When a life event jars you from the normal, it's amazing how quickly your world shrinks. It becomes a minute-by-minute, in-the-same-two-rooms life. Having a newborn will do that. Having a sick Linden did that again to us.
Two weekends ago Linden was very sick with super high fever. Adam and I had a good guess as to what was making her sick, but they sent us home from the ER on Friday with no diagnosis. And sent us home again on Sunday with a shaky diagnosis. Parents intuition should never be discounted, y'all. Linden did have a UTI like we suspected, and when we finally got them, the antibiotics kicked in quick!
It is no small thing to be your child's advocate. It is a willingness to put everything- your pride, your emotions, your Googled knowledge- on the line for the sake of your kid's best interest. You cry in front of and on the phone to nurses. Not weak tears. Burning, angry, fighting-for-answers tears. You ask doctors to answer the same questions several times. You basically look professionals in the eye and ask, "Are you sure you're doing your job to the best of your ability?" You get second and third opinions, willing to get a fourth. You shouldn't be a bully or unkind. You do have to be determined in getting answers and help.
When my kid is that sick, I've learned to start shedding priorities and tasks right away. Focus on the immediate and build out from there. Things like laundry, the blog, a barre class all get cut. As much as I'm tempted to count that as weakness, I'm beginning to see it as wisdom.
"Taking a break is not failure, it's wisdom."
I know all of you reading have events that made your world small for a time. Just here to say, I know that feeling too. I know it can be exhausting. I know the burning tears as you advocate for yourself or your kid or the truth. I also know the freedom in letting go of things that can wait. The strength in asking for help. The kindness of God in our vulnerable moments.
And you know what? Lord-willing, life will resume and get back to normal one day. For me, it was so much fun to spend nap time yesterday brainstorming and dreaming about the blog and my business, because I found the capacity to begin again!
I will be back next week with regular programming- yummy recipes, interviews and creative ideas. Until then, hope y'all have a great weekend!
